Catch up: married…twice

Today is the first official day of winter break. Ha-noodle! I will return to work on January 5th (Ok – I will probably go to school on Monday to work and copy but being at school without children is 99.9% less difficult).

Let’s back track to June – ehhh – half a year ago and play catch up.

I got married!

The first wedding in CT was for my family, and our NY-based friends. By first wedding, I mean we had two weddings.  Most people who do this are couples who have a destination wedding, or maybe their families live in different countries.  Nate and I are from MA and NY.  Two northeastern states that abut each other.  But we still had two weddings.  Let me give the short story.

When we started our wedding planning in August, 2013, we realized that our guest list was going to be really big because of families and cousins and parent’s friends.  Nate and I are not particularly popular, but all of our cousins are married and they all have children, so before we started inviting (our very few) friends, we already had well over 125 people.  We then retracted from our original plan and wanted to have a really small wedding with just immediate family.  Not everyone in our families was on board with this so then Nate came up with the idea of a road show wedding.  We’ll do two (originally it was going to be three!).  We desperately wanted to avoid a big wedding.  While it’s great to have everyone in one place, it’s insanely hard to spend quality time with your guests.  It always stinks when you travel to see a long-lost friend get married and then only speak to them for 74 seconds the whole weekend.  So, our primary reason was to break up one big event into smaller ones so we could generally just spend more quality time with the people were making an effort to be with us.

It often felt (and still feels) awkward to explain to people why we were having two wedding, particularly because it felt as if we were coming across as attention hogs which couldn’t be further from the truth.

Back to getting married.  Mom did most of the planning for our first wedding in July and it was beautiful, fancy and fun.  Here are some favorite photos from the event.

My college friend/old friend/close friend officiated, we got to stand up front with our siblings, and we composed simple vows to each other with a ring exchange (which I botched) ((hence the photo to the right)).  I had written the vows for both of us, practiced it dozens of times, have said it perfectly since 100 times, but couldn’t remember the lines when I was up there.   Of course.

We left the two inner most-front most chairs empty for my dad and Nate’s mom.  This felt special and right.  At the very start of the ceremony, Nate and I put bouquets on the empty chairs.

Married!  (my friend couldn’t technically marry us in CT, and our venue was just over the border from my mom’s home in NY.  She met us at my mom’s that morning and we technically got married before the big show).  Here’s the real deal earlier in the day:

The venue was so lovely.  My mom found it – not exactly sure how – but it ended up being perfect.  We ate and had cocktails outside in the garden and dessert and dancing were inside.  At night – when lit up with the tent – the garden was, shall I use a word I never-ever-ever use, stunning.

My childhood friend’s family’s restaurant catered the ordeal.  We had vegetarian food which I know bothered some people because some folks need meat to feel like they’ve been fed – but that choice was super important to me.  I also put out a disclaimer on our wedding website.  The food was tasty, and awesome.  I hope a few people realize that vegetarian food can be tasty and filling.

Two things happened that night which I normally hate, but loved here.  First off – group dances and congo lines generally put me off.  BUT – we had an all group congo line and for some reason it was so fun and hysterical.  I love this shot because it has my immediate family within it.  My brother (white shirt – front and center) has got the smooth moves.  And my mom isn’t wearing shoes.

Also – I hate selfies.  So hate selfies.  Nate and I say that selfie is short for selfish.  Which it is and no one can change my mind on that.  But – my sister took a groupie and I love this shot of her effort.

The weekend was really wonderful.  We had a 4th of July BBQ (vegetarian!) at my mom’s the day before.  The weather was really awful, as most people in the northeast know, and so we were confined indoors.  However, it was still nice to catch up with people casually.  This was something else we did to have more time to talk with guests – both weddings had rehearsal day BBQs and everyone was invited.

The day after the wedding my cousins stayed at my mom’s and we had a lazy day by the lake.  It was a great way to end the weekend.

|:| In between we did our honeymoon in Maine. We went from Portland to Yarmouth to Bar Harbor with our bikes on our car. In Portland we took a day trip to Peak’s Island (ehhh – ok, but we got bored), another trip to Sabboth Day Lake and the Shaker Village (yeah!). The lake was so lovely – I know we’ll be back.

Can you spot the kid diving off the platform.

On the way up to Bar Harbor we did a quick hike in Camden.  The hike that everyone does and you can drive up it too, so the top is quite crowded.  I’m not sure why so many people drive because the hike is very quick – maybe 20 minutes.  I am pretty sure I did this hike as a kid at camp and it felt a whole lot harder way back when.

In the days leading up to Bar Harbor we used AirBnB to save money for the actual B&B that we stayed in near Acadia (which was expensive!!).  AirBnB was awesome – and we’ll definitely be going that route in the future.

Acadia was lovely – though neither of us were too keen on Bar Harbor.  So insanely crowded and the shops and restaurants weren’t particularly useful to us (tourist wares don’t catch our fancy, and I don’t eat seafood).  But we loved Acadia and Maine in general and want to make it a yearly excursion.  While in Acadia we biked, hiked, sea kayaked and rock climbed.

All of the activities were fun and we had beautiful weather.  The park has beautiful carriage paths and we rented mountain bikes (we were nervous to take road bikes on the dirt and gravel).  We were able to bike to our hike and then do a loop around Mt. Penabscot and then bike back home again.  It was a fulfilling and activity-filled day.

Nate hiking (above) and me resting (below).

|:| When we returned home after a week away we had two weeks before the next event.  This is when I seriously doubted our plan because there was a ton of work to do. This was more of DIY-ish wedding, but we did have a wedding planner because I was feeling very overwhelmed.  The wedding planner was enormously helpful (highly, highly, highly recommend getting one if you can!), but preparing was still stressful.

At some point (too close) to the wedding date, I decided to sew all of the napkins for the event using old linens.  That took a.long.time.

At the recommendation of our caterer (who specializes in local food), we opted to go with compostable dinnerware, which ended up being great…and we have a bunch left over.  I plan on using them – but I need to find a composting facility to take them when we’re done.  Boston doesn’t have municipal composting…yet…and the compostable plastic won’t break down in my home bins.

We also drank out of mason jars…which is very in right now, but I do a lot of canning so it felt authentic.  The bonus was that I took the leftover jars home and used them when I decided to can 100lbs of tomatoes this summer.

The venue was also lovely, though the guy who owns it was insanely difficult to work with.  All in all – it worked out ok – but I’m not sure the venue was worth the stress and worry that came with it.

This wedding started with Nate’s extended family meeting at his dad’s house for a ceremony.  For this one, Nate’s friend  MCed.  Nate and I wrote extended pieces to each other, which felt more appropriate with just an intimate group listening.  Afterwards we took a few pictures and then headed to the venue in Sturbridge, MA.

One of the great things about two wedding is that anything you missed on the first try, you can get the second time around.  For example, my mom was getting dressed at the same time as me during the first wedding so at the second wedding she was able to help me with my dress.  Also, during the first wedding there were no photos of Nate getting ready, so we got those this time too.

Reusing all of your clothes for both weddings helped keep costs down.  Err.  Sorta.

All guests had a front row seat.

The venue was a farm/disc golf/brewery/pavilion.  So, we set up field games and there were farm animals to visit.  This helped the event feel casual and fun.  We also hired an 80s cover band for music and that was famazing.  We started the night with this and ended with this.  Thank you to my husband for his thoughtful playlist recommendations.

Guests were encouraged to take their glasses and napkins home with them to reuse – about 50% of everything went home…and hopefully they’re all being reused still.

High school friend signs the guest book.

Nate’s father’s coworker made this corn hole game and let us borrow it for the big day.

The llama stayed in this pose for over 20 minutes in the doorway to the barn.

Other DIYing included making 2/3 of the desserts…which was a pain in the butt to do in the days leading up to the wedding, but it helped spruce up the dessert table (the cupcakes are from Cafe Indigo).

The lead singer of the band.  They were so super.  During dancing in the dark the recreated the Courtney Cox/Bruce Springsteen exchange.

The evening was great.

So – I’m not sure if Nate and I have reached a consensus about whether we’d do our weddings the same way if we had a do-over.  I say yes – both had elements that were really special that we couldn’t have done in quite the same way if we had just one.  The ceremonies at each felt appropriate for the crowd, and I loved having a simple tribute to our parents in CT, and then telling Nate someone heartfelt in MA.  Also, having a more ‘traditional’ event with something more casual felt nice too.

Overall it still feels a little weird to share that we had two weddings, I still am uncertain whether people think it’s selfish/over-the-top.  But, Nate and I know that our intentions were so different that what may have come across, and I hope all of our guests know the same too.  If I were to give advice to someone doing the same, I’d recommend really communicating about why you’re doing what you’re doing, and how important both events are.  We had a HUGE no show rate at our second wedding (nearly 40%)!  I think a lot of people figured that because it was the second wedding it wasn’t very important. But – both weddings were equally important to both of us.

Beyond the weddings – married life has been fabulous.  Nate and I have come a long way from our initial dating days.

Nate’s college graduation (05/04)- we’ve hijacked the EMT cart.  Our strong connecting is evidenced by the matching bandana bracelet (on my right wrist) and necklace (on Nate) that I made us.

Married and celebrated on both 7.5.14 and 8.2.14.  Here’s to many more years of celebrating.

Big changes all at once. all around.

Yiks Yaks.  A lot of things have been happening around these parts.

Last night’s moon.

First off – I woke up this morning to a delicious temperature somewhere in the 70s after a 6-day heat wave.  Temperatures have been in the upper 90s for a looong time.  Thank you weather.

Next up – mortgage is approved – we are moving to our new house in less than two weeks (and only two boxes are packed!).  I’m excited. daunted. sad. preemptively tired. excited.

Third up.  Nate and I have decided to get married!!

Ringless engagement.  

For a long time I thought engagement rings were silly – why would you want two rings on one finger?  Then, I got pretty gushy about it and desperately wanted a ring and would look enviously at all rings near and far.   After a few years of finger stalking, I realized that I was much more invested in what the ring meant – engagement – commitment – lifetime togetherness, (and, let’s be honest, the relief that you’ve found someone and don’t have to worry about being single forever) than the ring itself.  I realized, in fact, that I didn’t want a ring after all.

In part it’s because of how it is traditionally exchanged.  If the tradition were for the future husband and wife to exchange gifts with each other, then hoorah!  That sounds fun.  I don’t agree with the idea that the woman wears a (typically) expensive peace of jewelry to make a statement that she will soon be ‘taken’.  And that the man doesn’t wear anything.  Of course, I know couples who have both exchanged engagement rings with each other (ok – I only know one couple that has done this).  And, of course,  many/most dear friends I have who are engaged or married don’t see this ring as an ‘I’m taken’ statement, instead it’s a tradition that most girls look forward to.  But, while I do love sparkly jewelry, I prefer not to participate in this practice because of what it means, even if most people don’t think of it that way.  Regardless of what people choose, it should feel good, and this decision feels really good to me.

Besides – Nate and I are buying a house!  We can’t throw pennies (err – hundreds of dollars…or (gulp) more) at a ring when we’re buying a house!!

I’m also interested in knowing when the expectation for a surprise and outlandish engagement first got started.  There are a ton of viral youtube videos with great proclamations of love (and often great showmanship).  Like this one.  (Which I actually love and have watched at least 10 times) . Our engagement story is much more subdued, and happened while hanging out in Myrtle Beach last week.  We have a plan to make a more lasting memory with just us, in a special place, in the near future.

As Nate has pointed out, and I agree, it feels like we’re giving an official label to something that is already official.  I’m happy for all those who have engagement stories that are different than mine, and if they’re happy, then I’m happy.  I think I just prefer that the expectation wasn’t for something over-the-top.  Because under-the-top is aweseome too.

|:| So yes – last week was in Myrtle Beach with Nate’s extended family (26 people!).  That’s a big family vacation.  The weather was lovely and I spent more time on a beach than I have in the past 10 years combined…so I’m all set for a long time to come.

Before dinner, the family meets for cocktails and cheese (and microwave popcorn because Nate’s grandpa likes it) and Nate’s cousin’s husband would occasionally bring out his guitar.  I captured this sweet photo between Emily and Andy.  I have one that’s even more awesome and the two of them are cracking up – but it’s blurry.

|:| Skipping around in chronological order, last month, Nate, his sister and nieces and I went strawberry picking in Chelmsford.  Here’s our bounty.

From this four quarts I made 5 pints of strawberry jam.  A few are low-sugar, and a few are high-sugar vanilla bean.   I always expect pick-your-own to be a steal.  I think those strawberries above cost about $16.  Which is definitely cheaper than the store, although I’m actually not sure how much cheaper.  The strawberries cost $4/lb.  It’s all ok, though.  Getting the girls out in the sunshine feels good…because many teens and tweens spend a lot of time inside!  

|:| My grandma, Nanny, has been having a rough few months since a hospitalization in March.  Two weeks ago she broke her leg on the stairs at her house.  Seniors are so brittle, it’s scary.  Nanny has had a low spirit, and I’m hoping that it will improve soon.  She’s pretty miserable right now.

When my family went to visit her in the hospital, I took this photo of my sister.  Ali showed up in her gardening hat which gave Nanny a chuckle – so that’s a good thing.

|:| I’ve also started my new job!  We have 2.5 weeks of PD, a day off, and then 2 weeks of full staff events before the kids arrive in mid-August.  I was definitely nervous before my first day (as to be expected), but so far, so good.  The school is a charter school and is full of motivated, smart and committed people.  It’s also very supportive and team-oriented.  It feels totally different than the public schools I’ve been in, in a good way.  I’m excited.

And, last but not least, I recently venture off into a new sewing orbit – stuffed animals.  I made this bear for my friend’s son’s 1st birthday.  I used this pattern from the Purl Bee, but I used all reclaimed materials (buttons, filling, and outer fabric).  I’m excited about this!  The blue is from nate’s old sweater, the red hands, feet and ears should look familiar, and the filling came from an old pillow.  Hooray!  This Teddy doesn’t look as pristine as the one from Purl Bee (as to be expected), but I think he’s got a nice, goofy essence.

May

My birthday is in May.  This year – I’m 30.  Nate is one year older and I’ve always liked it because he’s ‘broken in’ the year before I get there…I’m more used to the age because he hit it first.  Part of me is a big baby about getting older – and part of me doesn’t care at all.  I think what stands out for me this year is that my mom was 30 when she was married to my dad and when I was born.

As a kid – there are parts of your history that seem so basic and given – usually details that don’t matter that much, but they do when you’re little.  When I was a kid – my family was not religious (and we’re less so now).  STILL – when I met someone new, one of the first question I asked was, “Are you Jewish or Christian?”  (sad fact – I didn’t know that there were other choices).  My question had nothing to do with the religion itself, but the holidays.  A Christian answer made me feel happy – yes – they celebrating Christmas!  A Jewish reply…I felt sad that they didn’t get a tree/Christmas day experience.

So, for me, my parents ages when they got married are number that I’ve been repeating my whole life – telling strangers at the pool (I used to share my life story with anyone who was unfortunate enough to be within ear shot).  My mom was 30, my dad was 33.  Other important facts included my home address, my grandparents’ birth years and how many years apart they were (I used to be freaked out by the fact that when my grandfather was in 5th grade, my grandmother was in kindergarten.  I couldn’t fathom how a 5th grader could love a kindergartener.  But the fact that my grandma was only 19 when they married didn’t strike a chord…which it does now!) When I look at pictures of my parents at this age – they seem so much older than me.  They look older too.  

Mom at 29 – Dad at 32.  September 1981.

Mom and Dad get married – August 15, 1982

Now, I don’t mean they look old – they look so young.  They look older than me – or just more mature – but only because I feel so much younger than they were.  My mom had already been married for 5 years and had my sister by the time she was 27.  In the photos above – my dad had been married twice, divorced twice, lived in Panama for two years with the Army, started his own business.  Obviously comparing my own unmarried self to my parents’ failed marriages is a bad way to go.  But I instinctively go there.  I find myself feeling like I’m behind, even though I know it’s better to have never married than to have had a failed marriage.

I’m working on not going there.  What does it really matter if I have my own family at an older age than my parents?  That’s the question I keep asking myself because unless a baby falls in my lap in the next 12 months, I will be an older mom than my mom.  That’s ok.  Repeat – that’s ok.

 

|:| In other news, Jackson (Nate’s brother) (sorta) graduated from Northeastern!  Northeastern has a co-op program (aka internship) and many students take 5 years instead of 4 to graduate.  Jackson did two six-month co-ops, but he chose to graduate in four years anyway.   He’s taking 4 summer classes and will be officially done in August, but he got to walk last Friday.

Graduation was held in the Garden – we were in the nosebleed section but it didn’t matter….as long as you can see the jumbo-tron, you’re alllll set.

The unruly gang – photo taken in Christopher Columbus Park on the edge of the north end.  I love this trellis when the leaves are grown in.

|:| Home happenings – a few weeks ago, I went to the bathroom and Nate had left me three squares.  I thought it was a joke, but he later told me he was in a rush.  So, at the end of the next bathroom roll, I left him one square.  He then left the square and used a spare role, but didn’t put it on the holder – and made a tiny paper airplane out of the square.  Before I knew it, we were going back and forth doing things with the square – but not saying a word about it to the other person.  The festivities culminating with this creation, that Nate hung from the shower curtain:

Things like this are so fun.

 

|:| So, another one of the recipes that I love to make is sesame tofu.  As a kid, I only ate sesame chicken when we out for Chinese.  When I became a vegetarian in 2001, I would longingly watch my brother eat this beloved dish, and I would sometimes take his leftover sauce and eat it over rice.

I came across this recipe about a year ago here.  My version is mostly the same – but some crucial changes out of necessity and preference.

I present to you: Sesame tofu!  Serves 4 (or 3 hungry folks).

Ingredients

 

*1 pkg super firm tofu (btw – I never use non extra firm.  I find silken tofu to be extra gross)
*1 egg, lightly beaten
*1/2 cup cornstarch
*olive oil for frying tofu
*sesame seeds to sprinkle on at the end (optional)
*Side vegetable of choice (I usually do broccoli)
*Grain of choice (cous cous, rice, quinoa, etc.)

Sauce
*scant 1/4 cup sugar (I’ve used white or brown) – the original recipe calls for a 1/2 cup and I find it way too sweet.  Which says something because I’m addicted to sweet more than the average person.
*2 tbsp cornstarch
*3/4 cup water
*1/8 cup rice wine (recipe calls for rice vinegar, but I’ve used wine b/c it’s what I’ve had on hand and it worked fine)
*2 tbsp soy sauce
*2 tbsp sesame oil
*1 tsp red chili paste
*2-3 garlic cloves, minced

First – prepare your vegetable as you need to.  I often roast the broccoli for about 30 minutes at 400 degrees Fahrenheit.  If you’re making rice, or another longer-cooking grain, you should also start this now.  If you’re making quinoa or cous cous, you can start it while the tofu is frying.

1. Lightly beat the egg, and add cornstarch to another bowl.  Cut up tofu into cubes (too small – and it’ll take forever to prepare – too big, and the flavor of each bite will be boring).  I aim for 1/2 inch think by 1 inch long.

2. Dip the tofu in the egg and then coat in the cornstarch.  Place on a plate – try to keep tofu pieces from touching each other because they’re sticky.  This part takes the longest.

3. Coat pan in olive oil, transfer tofu to pan and heat on medium for about 15 minutes, flipping tofu pieces as necessary.

4. To make the sauce, combine all of the ingredients into a pot, and cook on medium-low heat until it’s bubbly – stirring frequently.  Continue cooking until the sauce thickens, then remove from heat.

5.  Once the tofu is done, combine the tofu and the sauce and gently mix.  Be careful – the sauce is likely to splatter because the pan is very hot.

6.  Serve tofu on top of grain with the vegetable on the side – or however you’d like it!

Cubed tofu with cornstarch and egg.

Post-coating of the tofu.

Pan-friend until deliciously crispy.

Ready to eat!

 

x-country falling

Gifts that keep on giving are awesome.  If you could rank all the gifts you ever received, I wonder how many are useful still to this day…probably not many.

Nate’s aunt gifted us an amaryllis bulb three years ago for Christmas.  We potted it and eventually we got some leaves…but no flowers.  A long time later, the leaves died, and we generally ignored the bulb.  Last winter, the leaves came back and in March we got flowers too!  They were awesome.

This year we have three flowers that are going to came in – last week they looked like this:

We came home after a weekend away and found this – flower splendor:

While I was having fun taking photos I took this one too – kind of like a starfish floating in the trees.

|:| This past weekend, we joined Nate’s family and went up to NH to stay at his aunt and uncle’s house (the same aunt who gave the amaryllis).  Nate’s uncle works at Gunstock – a skiing mountain – and he had bundles of free lift passes.  Given that I only skied once in 2003 – Nate and I opted for cross country.

 

It always takes two tries to get Nate to smile.

We did it once before last year in Maine.  This go around went much better (for me).  My falls were minimized and I took on some big hills (for me).  Nate had more falls than before – including an epic one that involved his ski planting perpendicular into the snow.  He fell hard on his hip and is still a little emotionally sore that my first instinct was to laugh instead of help.

It was a beautiful day and an awesome time all around.  The temperature went up to 48 degrees – so I didn’t even wear a coat.  The picture below was the least scenic part of our multi-mile trek.  The road was to our left and we were coming into the alpine center.  On the way down, Nate fell while trying to turn and then I took a big fall while I was distracted by Nate’s fall.  As I skidded to a stop I could see the drivers in the cars watching me.  Nothing like an audience.

|:| Abe had fun hanging with their dog Piper and spending a full 24 hours off leash – off leash outside time is coveted by a city dog.  Especially a city dog like Abe.  Piper is Abe’s polar opposite – dignified, refined, and follows all rules all of the time.  A few Thanksgivings ago, Abe pulled a turkey carcass off the counter and ran circles around the house while Piper sat quietly and watched.

|:| This week we are having our big annual fundraiser at work.  I put together this party favor – taking the picture and quote from two different first grade students…fits the gift pretty well.  Since we’re trying to raise money (he-hem, 75K) – the money plant is also a pretty good fit!

Remembering

It’s been busier than normal lately at work – and on top of that – I sat down and realized that I’m traveling nearly all of the weekends in March.   The last weekend in February I was in Maine, this past weekend I was in NY, next weekend is off to NH, and the following weekend will be on the Cape.  This is all fine, and everyone is busy, but I’m the type of person (like probably everyone) that needs to recharge.  I haven’t had a good recharge until today (the one night this week I can come home after work) – so I’m soaking in the relaxing.  I changed into PJs the moment I was done taking Abe for his afternoon walk.

Last week I went to Northampton, MA to do interviews for our summer fellowship.  Smith College has a botanical garden and I wasn’t expecting much at first – but it was really quite cool.

We were there right before their bulb show (one day before it started) so we couldn’t check that out, but what we saw was pretty neat.  (Bonus – the hot, muggy air made me feel like I was in the tropics for about 20 minutes.)  I really appreciated that there weren’t any ‘don’t touch’ signs – because there were many plants that were begging to be touched.  Seriously – don’t you want to touch the plants in the photos above?

In NY I went the baby shower of an old friend.  I’ve had two close friends have babies, but both were older…this is my first friend who’s had a baby who I very much consider to be on my level.  At first it felt weird, but now it feels more normal.  I even won the trivia game so I got some free movie tickets!  Ba-hoom!

My mom was out of town so I stayed at her house and took the train in.  I can remember how nervous I used to be about taking the train in when I was younger – getting on the right line specifically (Grand Central has four different lines that come in and out).  Taking the subway on my own also made my heart flutter (I was a particularly nervous child/adolescent).  I’m glad to know that I’ve moved past that now – I think I have for awhile, but this was the first time I noticed. That I was being really comfortable with getting around.  Maybe it’s because I had a smart phone.

|:| It looked like this man was looking right at me – but he was probably gazing out the window like I was.  

While I was home, I also gave myself the mission of finding photos of my dad.  I’m in the process of making a book in his memory, with a collection of stories/thoughts from friends and family.  My dad died in 2004, and beyond what people said at his memorial, I haven’t gotten to hear many people’s memories/thoughts of my dad beyond those of my immediate family.  My boyfriend spearheaded the same effort in memory of his mom, who died in 2011, and the final book is so lovely.  (I totally recommend shutterfly photobooks!)

On Friday, I stopped at Nanny’s to have dinner, collect her story about my dad and search through pictures.  Nanny graced me with extra stories of how hard I was to potty train.  She also cooked up some ravioli, salad, and white bread with butter.  Nanny is the best.

|:| At my mom’s I set to work looking through all of our family photos.  There were 11 boxes like the ones below – by the time I was done my back was sore from being hunched over the table.

On a scale of nostalgic I would rate myself on border-line obsessive.  I love the past: thinking about the past, remembering the past, talking to people about the past…and I’ve always been this way.  As a kid I had a stock collection of fun things to do – default activities to turn to when I was alone and bored: race matchbox cars down the incline of my parents’ tub, climb up and down the stairs on my stomach, and look at the family photo albums.  If I had to guess – I would say I did this at a minimum of once every two weeks.  I knew all of the photos by heart, and we had maybe 5-6 albums, but they were so fun for me to look at.

My mom has since dismantled the albums and all of our photos are in boxes.  I haven’t looked through these boxes in years, and seeing some of these old photos brought back so many memories – not of what the photos represent, but of me sitting on the family room floor looking at these photos and thinking about them.  I love that feeling when you see something that you haven’t seen/thought about in forever.  That moment you see it again, it feels like an old friend – it is so completely familiar.  There must be a special compartment in our brains where we store all of these things…the things we know in great detail but just forgot to think about.  I feel this often when my mom sends me a text of an old stuffed animal, etc.  There are a bunch of great photos of my dad – like these:

Dad with his dad (1955), dad on his wedding day (Aug. 15, 1982), Dad as a cutie pants (1954), Dad’s senior photo (1967).

I’ve uploaded many of the photos – but I’ve still got a way to go.  In looking at all of these photos, I realized that my eye lids are totally my fathers.  I’ve often been told I have sad eyes – which I think is really attributed to my heavy eyelids.  They’re just like my dads.

I also found so many great photos that I had never seen – especially photos of my sister as an infant.  Alison’s dad and our mom divorced before she was a year old.  I’m not sure where Ali’s baby photos were, but I never saw them as a kid – and I never really thought about it either.  Most photos begin when my parents met (Ali was 1.5).  I found a box with a ton of her early photos – and it was amazing to see her as a newborn for the first time. She had so much hair (opposite of me)!

And then there were so many that cracked me up or were just fun to see:

Mom at one of our summer partie s – I think 1987.  I love the perm, shorts – and especially the mickey mouse tank top.

Ali, Dad and I with my broken arm.  I fell off my sister’s bed while we were jumping with her friend.

When I got home on Sunday I was completely drained.  I think that looking at all of the photos, though really fun, was just too much nostalgia for me.  I ended up in a funk that was thankfully gone by the time I woke up.  It’s easy for me to feel really sad when I spend so much time thinking about the past.  It’s also really easy for me to idolize my past – something that I’m trying to figure out how to stop doing.  What I try to remember is that right now will be the past eventually, which means I’ll eventually idolize this time too.  I ultimately need to be more thankfully for what’s happening right now – I just haven’t quite figured out how to do that.

|:| I’ll end with this incredible photo – taken at Nanny’s in the late 80s.  That’s me!  I just noticed how my bangs looked like I cut them myself (I’m pretty sure I didn’t).  The cabbage patch doll in my hands stayed at Nanny’s house – and it always felt so special (because it was only played with on occasion it stayed in really good condition..notice she hasn’t lost the lace gloves!?).

NY tradition

Nate’s family has a habit of getting together in the cold winter months in – nyc.  Yes, I think it’s a little weird because NY in the cold isn’t my top choice.  BUT – they always have a good time.

Nate and I drove down to my mom’s house on Friday, and I took Nate to the train station.  I went back home and joined my mom for a dinner party.

The next morning, Abe and I joined Nate at Sal’s apartment on the upper west side – which turned out to be famazingly convenient to all weekend activities.

| Abe was a litte nervous about being left alone at first – he wined when we left him alone |

 

On Saturday morning we met Nate’s family for breakfast, and then went back uptown to pass some time while they saw Newsies on Broadway.  Nate did homework – and I napped for TWO hours.  Something I never, ever, ever , ever do.

We then headed down to meet them for dinner…at the Oyster Bar in Grand Central.  Grand Central is celebrating its centennial, and Nate and I arrived a bit early for dinner so we could check out the exhibit.  A lot of factual information – and my favorite tidbit of the night was the placement of Grand Central at 42nd Street.  Turns out that back in the day most residents of Manhattan lived below 42nd Street.  To prevent smog build up from the train engines, a law was passed preventing trains from running off of coal below 42nd street.  What they would do instead is unhook the train from the engine, and then use horses to pull the train further south into Manhattan.

ALSO – (go me, history!) – the 4 lines extending out of Grand Centra (e.g., New Haven, Harlem, etc.), used to belong to different companies.  They eventually merged.  AND, Amtrak used to run out of Grand Central – I think it stopped in 1989.

I hadn’t realized that the station keeps up a permanent exhibit of the flyers posted in the days after 9/11 for missing friends and families.  I found myself feeling very chocked up as I read the signs – many of which had information about the person (e.g., height, weight,etc.), but then afterwards people had written on them in pen messages of remembrances and RIP.  One sign showed a police office helping a woman.  The message asks that the image be circulated, as the police man, after helping this woman, went back into the building and was killed.  The widow of the deceased was hoping to locate the woman in the photo to talk with her.

 

Anyways – so, dinner at the Oyster House was great for company – but not a place to go as a vegetarian!

| I really liked the overhead lights sparkling in the wine glass – in fact, I asked the waiter for a wine glass just so I could look at it |

|The overhead lights and ceiling in the restaurant |

|Family shot coming out of the restaurant, but still in the terminal |

——-

| Back at Sal’s – Nate and Abe had a wrestling match |

 

Nate questioned my choice of getting on the floor to photograph Abe and his kong.  But I liked the red carpet.  Anyway, Abe is my only willing photography subject…

|Should I submit it to Kong for an advertising campaign?

 

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In totally unrelated news, I love blue potatoes.

 

Oddly, I took a bunch of photos after I sliced the blue potato, but when I downloaded the images from my camera they had mysteriously disappeared…

Weekend in NY

After thinking about doing it for a little while – I finally made some yogurt.  It was pretty easy, and cost effective.  I also learned about the difference b/w greek yogurt and plain – greek has the whey strained out, regular does not.  I think I’ll keep going with regular.  It feels like you get more for your money.

While I was at home we did a puzzle.  The thing about puzzles – its that they’re addicting.  You get a total high from finding a piece and putting it in its place.  But they also take forever!  I worked on this one for about 5 hours and was up until after midnight putting in the final pieces…

::I don’t even want to guess the hours that went into this puzzle…

::View from my* new bedroom window (*my as in the room designated for me in my mom’s new house)

I was recently inspired to make yogurt.  Well – I’ve thought about it for awhile, but just got around to it.  Pretty easy – and pretty tasty.  I think I’ll stick with it.  The photo on the left is after 12 hours incubating – you can see all the whey on top.  The photo on the right is after the whey was strained.  I used the whey as the liquid for bread making – and it seems to work well!  I think it changed the texture of the bread (though I can’t tell if I’m projecting my desire to use the whey in a useful way).

CNY

This past weekend we went to visit Nate’s gram at the retirement palace.  It’s a pretty incredible place.  There’s different levels of housing depending on your independence, and you can move through the system as you lose your abilities.  They also have lots of services for seniors, it’s clean, professional, and a nice environment.

Gram hits the hay at 8pm, so Nate, Jackson and I had fun on the town…in the main village hall.  Ping pong, and later visiting the pub (which was closed) to play board games.

We also did a photo shoot in the ping pong room.  I had to convince the fellas to get into it, but the results were pretty darn funny.

It was nice to spend a chunk of time with Gram.  She’s got everything in total sorts up in her mind, and with her 89 years of experience, she’s got a lot to share.  We got to here some stories about the days of yore, her working experience, vacations on the Jersey Shore, and we learned that playboys used to be called gayblades.  Beatz, Nate and I are going to help that term make a comeback…

Jesusmas

I’m actually not sure why we don’t call it Jesusmas.

On Friday Nate and I went to my house – after a year of construction, it’s nice to be able to go home to a home and not go couch surfing.

Abe and I had a photo shoot.

So did the lladro:

Christmas Eve led us to Nanny’s for our annual feast at La Gratta/Bella Luna.

Exchanging some gifts at Nanny’s – and texting.

Ali and Lucy have the same expression…

Family photo – took a lot of takes to get it just right.

Christmas day in South Salem.

We left at about 11 to go to Nate’s.